Mental health is not a destination but a process. It’s about how you drive, not where you’re going.
Most people feel anxious at times. Anxiety is the worst feeling in the universe. One minute you’re on top of the world, chatting with your mates, having a good time. The next you’re struggling to breathe. An intense feeling of dread overcomes you. You start to shake all over like jelly. Anxiety is a natural response to things that happen in our lives, and most of the time – It can really suck! It’s particularly common to experience some anxiety whilst coping with stressful events or changes, especially if they could have a big impact on your life such as getting married or moving house. It’s also common for anxiety to occur in the little things, which may have minor impacts on most people, such as walking down the street, posting on social media or simply stating your own opinion.
I personally suffer with severe social anxiety.
Social anxiety is a feeling of insecurity or low self-esteem and fear of being criticised.
This can result in difficulty performing everyday activities. I get mine worse when I’m either outside or on my phone. I have this fear that wherever I go or whatever I do people are judging me based on what I post on Facebook or by the way I walk down the street. I have had countless panic attacks by thinking someone is following me at night when they’re just walking in the same direction as me. Anxiety for me is the worst thing in the world.
I also have mild PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder).
PTSD is where you often relive a traumatic event through nightmares and flashbacks, and may experience feelings of isolation, irritability and guilt.
In my past I was too anxious to take blame for certain situations I got myself deep into so instead of confessing I let my social anxiety win and I didn’t open up about anything, thus making the situation worse. Now later in life, I have extreme feelings of isolation and guilt. Plus I often have a reoccurring flashback of my mother, who passed away in 2014, laying in the hospital.
All in all, anxiety is horrifying. People with an anxiety disorder feel as though there is no help in the world due to society’s criticism. Anxiety can make you feel agitated, on edge, tense and uneasy. This can affect your mood a great deal and then depression can be developed, and in my experience the two both cause each other. My depression gives me anxiety and I’m anxious about depression. For me, the two are connected forever and it’s hard to keep them both under control. Whereas at the end of the day, I just keep telling myself it could be worse and I should appreciate being alive every second.